As I sit here writing this blog entry, I think of all the memories that make this so special to share with the world. You see, tomorrow, October 27th, marks the 6th Anniversary of the death of my Mom. She was my best friend, my shopping buddy, my mentor, my comfort and my strength. No one has ever made me laugh quite like she did. No one ever or will ever understand me the way she did. And nothing will EVER be able to fill the giant hole that has been left by her passing.
You see, my Mom hated racing. She despised that her little girl's world revolved around a car and the speed it went and the sound it made and the way it made her baby feel as it rumbled past. The adrenaline rush of watching NASCAR live and in full effect at Darlington made her sad that she had lost her daughter to a man's sport. But she still went along on my excursion to South Carolina once a year with my Dad. She rented a car and went shopping while I met drivers and bought souvenirs.
One year my friend and I went to race shops and met numerous drivers. When I showed her a picture of Rusty Wallace, her reply was, "He's good looking." "Yes Mom, and he smelled good too!", was my grinning response to her. Every time I mentioned his name I got the same reaction. "He's good looking." I must admit, Mama had taste.
She was also incredibly fond of Dale Jarrett. She thought he was handsome and made it clear that she liked him. Every time she saw the UPS truck she said "88, there's Dale Jarrett". It was so cute and I couldn't help but laugh. To this day, I still hear her say that when I hear the UPS truck race up my gravel road to the neighbors house.
I was never a birthday cake kinda girl. I wanted the candles and the icing but the cake itself was not my thing. So she frequently bought me a big chocolate chip cookie decorated especially for me on my special day. One year it was a race car, and on the door was the #12. I asked, "Mom, how did you know?" She informed me that she knew more than I thought and that I was no mystery to her. I asked my Dad if he had told her and I believed him when he told me that she figured it out on her own.
I still have the picture of that big cookie and I still stand in complete amazement that she knew I was a Jeremy Mayfield fan and the #12 belonged on my race car cookie. Somehow, she just knew. When I beamed because I'd met someone I idolized, she celebrated with me. When my driver won, she was happy in spite of her disdain.
I still can't believe that it's been another year since she left me. I feel like I lost her yesterday. Part of the reason I am able to make it through the grief and the pain of being without the center of my universe is because I have the support of someone who understands. Someone who has been there, who cares when I cry and grieve and someone who willingly drops EVERYTHING to be there to support me through my most difficult times.
I truly believe that this person was sent to me straight from heaven. I can just see my Mom up in Heaven, seeing my tears fall, knowing that somehow she has to see me through this tough journey without her. I can see her going to Jesus and saying, "Could you send someone to support my baby? Someone who will understand, who will never let her down and someone who will love her through this?" And Jesus graciously obliging her. I can see them walking across Heaven surveying the planet, searching for the perfect person to do this high priority task. I can see my Mom's face light up as she spots the perfect person and says "That one! I want you to send that one to my baby! They will be perfect for her and they will help her make it through".
I can see the smile spread across Jesus' face as he looks at my Mom and says "Well done Virginia! That's who I picked too. But not just because Rebecca needs someone to help her through. But because Rebecca can return the favor. They are perfect for each other and meant to be together." Truly a match made in heaven!
So while I mourn another year without my Mom, I also celebrate another year with the most amazing friend God could have ever blessed me with. I don't need to mention any names, because they already know who they are. If I did try to point out this angel to people, they would simply brush it off and deny that they ever did a thing. They don't need any recognition or thanks. They honestly don't think they ever made a difference in anyone's life, let alone mine.
So on October 27th, I celebrate the legacy of my Mom, Virginia, and the blessing of a friendship she created in her new heavenly home to make sure I know just how much she truly loves me. Because when I hear my angel say my name, make them laugh, and just spend time with them.... I know that I'm doing something right because I was loved and had a glimpse of the heart of two of the most beautiful and amazing people on the planet.
Rest In Peace Mommy - I love you!
Thank you my dear friend - you are my heart and I would be nothing without you! May God bless you beyond measure for putting up with me and always coming to my rescue and showing me that there is nothing we can't get through....TOGETHER! I love you!
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